Quote of the Week:
June 14, 2009
"Besides the noble art of getting things done, there
is the noble art of leaving things undone. The wisdom of life consists
in the elimination of nonessentials."
-Lin Yutang
Oddz 'n Endz-1
Link of the Week
So you think you're limber? I never heard of the
Ross Sisters who, evidently, were popular in 1944. Their act gets better
as it progresses and you will be amazed at how the sisters exit the stage
at the end of their performance. (HINT: Watch past the first 60
seconds or so, then look out!)
Bailout BS
"The road to positivity is strewn with the abandoned
vehicles of the faint-hearted."
-Peter McWilliams
But You Knew That Already
"President Obama's in the news, of course. He's put
health care back in the news. Yup. President Obama says he wants to create
a national health care plan that's both affordable and easy to use. Yup.
Yeah, good. Yeah, and the insurance industry says they'll fight the plan
with congressmen who are both affordable and easy to use."
--Conan O'Brien
Oddz 'n Endz-2
I always laugh!
Sam: Grampa would you do my math homework for me?
Grampa: No, Sam, it wouldn’t be right.
Sam: Well, at least you could try...
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Quote of the Week Panel
"Isn't that the cleverest thing you ever heard?
What?"
Headline of the Week
In Attempt To Jump-Start Economy, Obama Declares Tuesdays
Ladies' Night
(The Onion)
OLD AGE NEWS FROM ALL OVER
JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT THINGS COULDN'T GET ANY MORE STUPIDER
Redwood City, Calif. (APee) --
A 74-year-old San Mateo County woman won't have to stand
trial on a charge of methamphetamine possession after prosecutors said
they're dropping the case after a mistrial.
Margaret Catherine Cataldo was arrested in November of 2008 after police
say they found a bag of methamphetamine and drug paraphernalia in her
Burlingame home.
Though she was already on probation for possession of methamphetamine,
Cataldo said someone visiting her "might have left them in her
home without her knowledge...."
A REAL DILEMMA
An old man was on the beach and walked up to a beautiful
girl in a bikini -
"I want to feel your breasts" he exclaimed.
"Get away from me, you crazy old man" she replied.
"I want to feel your breasts, I will give you twenty dollars,"
he says.
"Twenty dollars, are you nuts!? Get away from me!"
"I want to feel your breasts, I will give you ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS"
he stated.
"NO! Get away from me!"
"TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS" he offered.
She paused to think about it, but then comes to her senses and said,
"I said NO!"
"FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS if you let me feel your breasts,"
he claimed.
She thought, well he is old, and he seems harmless enough...and $500
IS a lot of money....
"Well, OK...but only for a minute."
She loosened her bikini top and while both are standing there on the
beach, he slid his hands underneath and began to feel... then he started
saying, "OH MY GOD...OH MY GOD...OH MY GOD..." while he
was caressing them.
Out of curiosity, she asked him, "Why do you keep saying, 'Oh
my god, oh my god'?"
While continuing to feel her breasts he answered, "OH MY GOD...OH
MY GOD...OH MY GOD...OH MY GOD, where am I ever going to get five
hundred dollars?"
CHECK IT OUT!
"For you older women
who'd care to stay younger, "
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